


Ice Chips

by aptasi



Category: Wheel of Time - Robert Jordan
Genre: Abuse, Awkwardness, Dark Comedy, F/M, Fear, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Support, Threats of Violence, stillling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 01:28:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30030960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aptasi/pseuds/aptasi
Summary: After Moiraine gets frightened while too close to one of Rand's fits of temper, the men in her life try to be supportive. Set in Tear.
Relationships: Moiraine Damodred & Lan Mandragoran, Moiraine Damodred/Thom Merrilin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	Ice Chips

**Author's Note:**

> Rating and Warnings for: Intense threats (somewhat gendered but not sexual), vomiting (non graphic), and references/jokes related to suicide from stilling.

"Moiraine?" 

The Aes Sedai staggered into her rooms. Lan could feel she was white-out terrified. 

"Moiraine, what is it?"

"No danger. None imminent, at least. I might sick up."

By the time Lan got a basin to her she was. So, Lan held her hair out of the way. He had always been awkward at this. Frankly, he did not get much practice. Moiraine rarely drank to excess, and she had a tight control on her emotions. She'd done this for him more than the other way around. Not often either but more. 

"It's alright … he told her. "Just let it happen."

If anything, her fear got worse. 

"Your stomach, I mean. Whatever it is, we will face it, and the Light will win."

Moiraine spat one more time and then wiped her mouth on a rose-embroidered handkerchief. "I apologize. I am reacting too much. I need to lie down."

"Even you get sick sometimes." Before Lan could help Moiraine further, there was a heavy knock at the door. 

"What is it?" Lan snapped

Thom Merrilin's voice answered. "I am here for Moiraine."

Lan threw the door open. You do this to her, Gleeman?"

"No, you overgrown suit of armor I was just..."

"Lan, do not." Moiraine said. 

"He…" 

"He came to check on me, or so I assume."

Check on her? 

"Our Rand threatened to still her."

Lan felt like his chest had been frozen in Borderland air. "I beg your pardon?"

"He was trying to bluster the High Lords. Some fool called him on it and said he was an Aes Sedai puppet. He said the Aes Sedai agree with him not the other way around and asked Moiraine didn't she agree with some point..."

Moiraine crossed her arms. 

"You need to sit down Moiraine." Lan instructed.

"And well, the lad was obviously blatantly wrong."

"Very" Moiraine seemed to be feeling a little better, which was the only reason Lan wasn't tossing Thom out on his multicolored hind parts. 

"And Moiraine's bound by the First Oath, so even trying to equivocate she's stuck with saying something he doesn't like."

Moiraine nodded.

"So he goes furious and threatens to still her on the spot. Moiraine, you must know Rand didn't mean it "

"That was not Rand." Moiraine said through gritted teeth. 

"Well… yes I know but it was the Dragon wasn't it?"

"Yes, it was."

Lan felt angry and a little aimless. He strode to their power aided cold-box and got Moiraine some ice chips. "Try these." he ordered. 

"The Dragon pointed out that I did not need the ability to channel to serve him with knowledge, and perhaps if I was so set on being intellectually superior he should…" Moraine's mouth twisted in disgust and Lan felt her stomach churn, "prune me right then to make an actually useful scholar of me."

"Should have tipped everyone off right there, the lad was off. Rand? Prune?" That Gleeman added.

"He was capable of remembering that I called myself a scholar though, which is interesting at least in the abstract."

The Gleeman had an odd look on his face. "Rand has a thing about women. I don't think he'll actually kill you." 

Moiraine shrugged. "It seems I have to do everything myself." 

Merrilin looked disgusted. "I mean he might not want to cause your death either." 

"Well next time Rand is calm you might question him on philosophical definitions of causes and see to which he ascribes." 

Lan could feel that Moiraine was holding on to her composure white-knuckle tight. "Can he… do that, Aes Sedai?" Lan managed to say. "Still you by himself?"

"I did not think so. Until he had a shield on me with Callandor in his hands, and then suddenly it seemed I could hold no other opinion."

"Well…" Lan said. What was that bell-toed nuisance still doing here? "I don't blame you if you lost your composure."

"She kept it actually." Thom said. "Very calm, smooth face, asked if she could be allowed to first release you. 'Stilling is hard on the Gaidin', she said, 'and my Lan has done nothing wrong'."

Moiraine would have passed his bond just as easily stilled or dead, all the same as far as he knew. Why care about releasing him then, where she was willing to do without it elsewhere? For that matter, why did he feel lightheaded too all of a sudden? "Eat those chips before they melt." 

"Your name may have snapped him out of it." Moiraine said. "He said it was only a jest"

"It wasn't Thom muttered. "But yes he made everyone laugh and made a bit chummy fuss over Moiraine and what a good sport she was. Slapped her back and everything."

"Thom, did he look terrified himself to you at that juncture?" Moiraine was starting to sound and feel shrewd again. 

"Yes." Thom grunted. "Scared farm boy "

Lan knew the look. 

"Scared of what he was capable of…" The Gleeman added. 

Moiraine stared off into the distance, eyes unfocused for what felt to Lan like an uncomfortably long time, while far too full of emotion. Then, strangely, she turned and looked the Gleeman in the face. "This, now, the way I feel. It is how I made Rand to feel after The Eye, is it not?"

The music-making spy met Moiraine's gaze back. "Well, yes."

"If I…" Moiraine said, "May call that necessary then he as The Dragon may certainly make the same claim for me."

"You can just say you shouldn't have handled it that way, woman. No need to tie yourself in bloody knots about it."

"Change my mind after empathy had been forced on me but too late to change the action? How awfully cliche…"

Thom patted Moiraine's arm. What in the Light was the man after? "S'alright… we're grown people."

"I knew it was a bad tactic at the time." Moiraine said. "But used it anyway. Make of that what you will, Thom Merrilin."

The Gleeman huffed into that odd looking mustache of his. "What will you do when he escalates?"

No one missed the word choice there. Not if. 

"Well," Moiraine had a tone of laughter under her breath and it make for a current of hysteria. "He is right that I do not precisely need the power to be useful. Why only keep me away from windows and sharp objects, and I must just continue as normal. " She was near to giggling and to crying. 

The bloody man dared to look shaken by that. "The boy does it again, I'll interfere."

What? Him? Him interfere? What business had the Gleeman intervening? That was not for him to do. 

"Thom, no." 

"The boy trusts me. I can talk him down."

"You could be killed."

"So could we all at any time, you're always saying. Aren't we all due to pitch face first off our horses down ten flights of stairs any second now?"

"It was my bad luck."

"Well, I should have intervened." Thom said. "And the next time something like that happens, I will."

Moiraine hesitated. "I would rather you…" she took a breath. Her emotions felt like a bunch of writhing snakes inside. "If I ever have to adjust to life without my power, perhaps you could help teach me to do so."

"And keep you away from knives and heights?"

"Only…" Moiraine shrugged. "Since you seem to want a way to intervene."

"Well alright then, woman." Thom said. "It's a date."

Everyone was silent. Why was the man not leaving?

"So, woman, is that only if you lose your power because I have a lot of feelings but…" 

The metaphorical writhing snakes inside Moiraine's sensation all started attempting to frolic and leap

Oh lovely, just bloody flaming grand. "Eat your ice chips." Lan said.


End file.
